Happy moments, praise God. Difficult moments, seek God. Quiet moments, worship God, Painful moments, trust God. Every moment, thank God.
I have been struggling lately with the spiritual side, the physical side, and emotionally side. Yesterday my visiting teacher came over and we ended up having a good converstation. The message was about marriage. I felt like for the first time we kind of bonded. She is about 80 something old and just hasn't seem like we have much in common...but we ended up having a really good talk. She then pointed out the quote that that I started this blog with. It really hit me and I knew that it was meant for me. I know that I try to do things on my own and instead of trusting God I try to trust in myself. I don't know how many times he needs to humble me and show me that I can not do on my own...and when I do it on my own then I usually struggle.
Right now things have been tight with money. I have been a Loan Processor for the past year and half. I have been able to work from home and I have really gotten use to be able to be my own boss. So anywho...my job has pretty much gone away because of the way the market is. It has changed so much...so I am pretty much out of the job. I have been looking for something for me to do part-time...and yet it breaks my heart of thinking of leaving Gavin. I know that sometimes you just have to do what you have to do. I think a part of me would really like having a job where I am with other people and get a break from Gavin...since I am a people person...and lately I have been feeling really lonely.... but at the same time I hate the thought of someone else watching my little boy... we also have been searching for a new job for Corey...but nothing yet for either one of us. I don't really like sharing these things with people...but this is one of the examples that the Lord is humbling me right now. I know if I put more faith in him that things would work out a lot faster. Things don't happen on our timetable...it happens on his timetable.
Anywho I guess that is right now. Good night!
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2 comments:
Oh dear Mindy! I am sympathizing with you. I remember going through that emotional, physical, spiritual, etc. hardship. I still get it. It happened just about the same time as were you are with Gavin. Getting out will help A TON! You love your baby, but when I finally took the time to get away, I started to feel better about myself. It was so hard, but it helped. I don't work away from home, but I do have errands to run for my job, so I leave about three times a week. It is still hard, but I am a happier me when I get back. Good Luck with the job hunt. Something will come up!
Oh Mindy... I Miss you soo much girl. I love your blog. I know how you feel and am praying for you. Thanks for sharing this stuff with me. You are a great person and the Lord loves you. Keep on Keepin on!!!!
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